Bettie Page Died. Betty Paige died?   No, Bettie Page Dide.   

Passing of an Icon

  I am nearly speechless over the news that last century’s second most famous pin-up girl died. Part of that is because she died of normal causes – apparently cardiac arrest as a complication of pneumonia – and not from asphyxiating on a ball-gag in her mouth.  She just didn’t pass away funny enough for commentary.    

   Now, don’t get me wrong, I think some of those early Bettie Page stills reveal one of the sexiest women ever to ride an Indian motorcycle in a leopard skin loin cloth.  From physique to haircut to wildly expressive face that woman was a tough act to follow.  Nevertheless, if there is a particular look that more women have tried to duplicate than any other then it’s the one original to Bettie Page. 

    I suppose my ambivalence over this iconic famous vixen stems from the fact that I’d been a Bettie Page fan, in a way, long before I’d ever heard her name or had seen a deck of her dirty playing cards.  The statuesque, sturdy, dark-haired girl with B+ cups had already been ingrained as an archetype female from countless Saturdays spent watching monster flicks on Creature Double Feature.  By the time I became aware of Ms. Page there was little for her to do beside nudge Lynda Carter and Farrah Fawcett down on my roster of beautiful women.  She would, however always remain in the shadow of some nameless brunettes who’d been poisoned by Triffids or devoured by demon tiki poles. And even they were fated to mere backup roles behind the utter magnificence of that goddess from Forbidden Planet, Anne Francis.* 

   Anyhow…Betty Page.  For a woman whose photos portray a vibrant, fun-loving human being it seems she had more than her share of downs in life. That’s a shame for anybody. But her obit in the New York Times and some biographies on the net suggest that her final years were spent happier – and that has to count for something.  A heart attack probably meant she passed with a look of shock on her face, but I hope she had been smiling up to that point.  She deserved that after all – sarcasm aside, the world would have been a drearier, less interesting place without people like her.  Goodbye, Bettie – you done good. 

*I oughta note that Anne Francis is actually a tawny blonde, which should help improve the appreciation of this article in Mrs. Roberts’s eyes…  

Lastly, without a personal collection of Bettie Page erotica to upload, here’s an impromptu graphic tribute to the queen of thick, raven locks and straight cut bangs: